12th July, 2015.
An evening of October 2076, Apollo hospital.
“Rishi…” Dishant’s frail and wrinkled hand crawled into
Rishi’s, like looking for one last strength. The corner room in the hospital
was one quieter than usual. Rishi chose this room for Dishant after the second stroke;
he knew that silence sometimes is all one needs. He kept looking out of the
window, beyond the grey skies that had rained its last drop for the day,
leaving the city under a chilly air of an oncoming winter; Dishant’s voice
pulled him back in the cold room. “Rishi, it’s time! I am clocking out!”
“Shut up!” Rishi said, as he kept looking out, trying to
avoid the conversation.
“Dude please. Pull the plug. You were there when the doctor
gave his verdict. This will become worse the further I let it, just pull the
plug. Just let me rest in peace brother.”
“Chup karega chutiye?” Rishi gritted his jaws as he hissed
out his reply. 82 years old, both of them, maybe a difference of a few months,
yet they never ceased their filthy language when annoyed. “Captain Dishant
Tomar of the Indian Air force, I never pegged you as a quitter.”
“I am not! But when you are 82, paraplegic, with just three
fingers working, and has suffered two strokes along with the chances of worse
situations with a limited life expectancy, I guess you get the picture of it. No,
I am not quitting, I had lived my fill and I don’t want to spend my last days
as a rotting vegetable with pitiful glances, no! If I die, it better be quick
and fast, like I used to live in my glory days!”… Dishant stopped to catch his
breath.
A night of June 2015.
The phone vibrated callously as Rishi was just going to bed.
He missed the first ring, picking up it the second time. Dishant calling. 12.30
am. Naturally, if someone is calling that late, something is wrong and a matter
of urgency. Rishi picked it with a beating heart, hoping for‘not bad news’. It wasn’t.
Strangely, Dishant’s voice was calm and poised.
“Sleeping?” Dishant asked.
“Nah, what’s up?” Rishi replied, with a relief.
“Alright, it might sound strange, come out to the balcony
and look down.”
Confused, Rishi went to the balcony and looked down; Dishant
was standing under the orange glow of the street light, looking right at him. The
both lived in the same colony, different wings. Waving his hand, Dishant spoke
on the phone again, “bring some cigarettes and two glasses, I’ve got rum, meet
me in the park in 2 minutes, and don’t ask any questions.” Dishant raised a quarter
bottle of old monk over his head.
“What?” Rishi replied, still trying to figure out what was
going on. It was 12.30 in morning, and his best friend was standing right down
his building with a liquor bottle in his hand, that was even more confusing. “Alright
wait.”
2 minutes later, both of them sat on a bench in their colony
park, somewhere dark so that none sees them. Dragging on his smoke, Dishant
exhaled leisurely, while Rishi, after the impatient minutes finally asked him
about the shenanigans that were going on.
“Nothing, just felt like having a drink. Family is out on a
trip to hometown, I will be leaving in a week, was getting bored, thus this.”
Dishant replied.
“Okay, par bhenchod yeh koi time hai?” Rishi asked leaving a
gush of grey smoke in the air followed by emptying his glass and refilling it
with more rum.
“Nope, it isn’t, but do we really need time to grab a drink?”
“Abe Shiv ko bhi bula lete phir!” Shiv being their friend
and the third member of this trio.
Putting his cigarette out, Dishant lit a new one, dreamily
looking at the darkness. “Kal bula lenge saale ko; abhi, just enjoy the shit
bro.”
Exhaling in surrender, Rishi too lit a new cigarette and sat
back on the bench in silence… "This is good!" He said.
Apollo Hospital, 2076…
Shiv entered the room, with his wife Lavanya, who became
another person to join this group. Shiv became a member of parliament after his
stint with his art school took a back seat, the school which he founded and
where he met Lavanya and finally, after a string of unsuccessful affairs with
numerous women, fell for the woman he always dreamt of, or so what he kept
telling the other two.
“How are you holding up?” Shiv asked, taking a seat beside
him and Rishi.
“Hah! I can’t hold anything, figuratively. And since my time
is just up, I am making some arrangements.”
Rishi left his chair and stood by the window, Shiv ran his
fingers through his thin hairs in a desperate motion. “Bhenchod, phir wahi!”
Shiv said. “Why are you so adamant about dying on us? Where is your thirst for
living?...”
An afternoon of May 2013…
“Dude, I need to use the bathroom”, Shiv said leaving Rishi
and Dishant and the dinner for the moment. Dishant and Rishi both were bashing
the buttons on the playstation controller. “The third switch from right is for
the bathroom’s light!” Dishant shouted. Pausing the game for the dinner, Rishi lit
a goldflake.
“Kitni peeyega saale? You’ll burn your lungs before you put
your foot out of college, gandu!” Dishant scolded. Rishi’s smoke intake has
been increasing since the past week, and Dishant has been warning him
accordingly, sometimes snatching the cigarette out his mouth and flinging it on
the ground.
“How’s Veenu?” Rishi asked to change the subject. He knew
that Dishant will keep talking about this.
“She’s good, and don’t change the subject fucker!” Dishant
said. “Throw this one out, now! You already had burnt 4, and it’s enough!”
“Alright, alright nanny!” Rishi put the cigarette out and
placed it back in the packet reluctantly, albeit knowing the fact that he
indeed had smoked more than the usual. Shiv joined them and said, following Dishant,
“dude really, stop smoking before you go up in the smoke.”
“Yeah yeah whatever!” Rishi placed the food on plate.
Dishant’s parents were out and he invited both of them to stay over. “By the
way, Dishant, did you talked to Sonakshi yet?”
“Who’s Sonakshi?” Shiv looked up, his hands stopped near his
mouth with a grovel dangling.
“Oh, you haven’t noticed? There’s this girl in our college
from English honors. And our dear friend here had his eyes on her!” Rishi said,
poking Dishant. “Ass hasn’t got the balls to go up and talk to her!”
“Well what am I supposed to say? I already have a
girlfriend! Yes I do like her, but that’s about it!”
“Well what you normally would say? You’re a talker, that’s the
only talent you have that you talk, so go talk!” Shiv said.
“I can’t!” Dishant said slouching back into the sofa, “and
plus, she doesn’t sees me, not to forget that I have a girlfriend now!”
“Yeah yeah, you and your excuses, beta, tumse naa ho payega”
Rishi said, munching on the food.
Dishant leaned forward to eat and said, “What about you?”
looking at Rishi. “When are you going to talk to her?”
“Who?” genuinely confused, Rishi asked.
“HER” Dishant said
throwing a knowing look at Rishi and winking at Shiv.
“Oh no. No no no no no no! you’re not dragging her into
this!” Rishi said in a mocking and alarming voice.
“Err, who are we talking about again?” Shiv asked, confused
by this conversation.
“There is this girl,” Dishant took a bite off his food,
turning to Shiv, “fucker has been in love with her for like a year now, and yet
is stupid enough to not to tell her. And you say I don’t have balls. Bhenchod I
just had a crush on Sonakshi, he has fully fledged felling of love and won’t
tell her! Ab bol, chutiya nahi hai yeh?”
Rishi kept his head down, like he was focused on the chicken
curry’s texture, ignoring Dishant. Shiv laughed and said, “Saale gandu. You
should tell her before its way too late. You still have time!”
“I can’t! I mean I want to, really, but can’t. She’s just
amazing you know. But I don’t want to lose her. What if she gets pissed off? We
are very good friends you know, and its okay if I don’t tell her, in my heart…”
“Aawh shove your poetry in your ass mate!” Dishant said. “How
do you know that she will leave or something? you had a vision or something? Dude,
the chances are 50-50, either she will, or she won’t. Just man the fuck up and
tell her that you love her, and then leave it on her to decide. If she doesn’t,
it’s alright if she does, well, that’d be great too! Nothing can go worse than
this!... tell you what! you talk to her, and I promise you that I will talk to
Sonakshi and tell her about the thing, along with the fact that I have Veenu
now!”
Rishi exhaled in surrender, “eat your food bro!” Dishant
never talked to Sonakshi, even when Rishi finally gathered the courage, and
gave Dishant the good news months later…
Apollo hospital, 2076.
“The thirst to live? Look at me Shiv! I cannot move, I don’t
know when I am sleeping in my own shit, when I am pissing in my pants, the only
thing I can do now is to look out of the motherfucking window and see the
changing seasons. I was born to fly, I flew the goddamn fighter planes, I touched
the skies and now I am here, an old, rotting paraplegic. You call this a
living?” tears rolled down Dishant’s cheeks uncontrollably, as he was unable to
wipe them out. Shiv sat gloomily, Lavanya too was unable to speak. Rishi didn’t
turn towards them, he kept looking out of the window, but everyone in the room
knew that he too was failing in the attempts to hold his tears back.
“Look” Dishant calmed his voice, “really, there is no point,
I mean, I am happy, I have no regrets, and there is nothing left for me to look
forward too. And it is my choice only, it’s not even illegal now, if that
concerns you. As my friends, you two, I am asking this last favor, just let me
sleep. I don’t want to be like this. Either give me my wings back or just let
me sleep. Let me be in peace now. Please!”
It started raining again. Rishi was wrong, the rain wasn’t over.
Not over the city, and certainly not inside the corner room of Apollo Hospital
which was still quieter than the usual.
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